JUNO - the One Who Says She's Happily Married
April showers bring May flowers but right now all you can think about is how can someone collect 18 umbrellas, none of which work. The last time you went out with one and tried to open it, the top disengaged from the handle, shot across the intersection and almost impaled some guy who was trying to put money in the parking meter. The time before that, your umbrella opened into a flat surface like a huppa and a passing rabbi started to perform wedding vows with you and a nearby linden tree. Next time try a beach umbrella. You might still get wet, but there's always the chance you'll meet a lifeguard.
